She has to be reminded to swallow very often. Family members aren't ready to start feeding her. They feel like if she still can, we should let her. She doesn't have many teeth left, only the front. So I cut her food up very small. Now she stuffs her mouth so full that she couldn't chew even if she had all her teeth. Any thoughts?
With each bite you remind her to chew then take a sip of water, juice or what ever the beverage of choice is.
I also would rub the jaw line and cheek area when my Husband would eat. This way I could be certain that most of the food was out of his mouth before he would take another bite. I often had to move his plate away from him so he would swallow.
If she is not chewing properly it might be time to think about pureeing the food. You can do each individual food separate so it is not all mushed together.
This makes it a bit more like "real" food and it is visually more appealing.
If at anytime she begins to cough or choke not only do you positively have to puree the food but be very aware of liquids, you may have to begin thickening thinner liquids so she does not choke
Is she choking, periodically, or more often? Coughing when her mouth is full?
Have any of her doctors considered checking for swallowing disorder? It's not uncommon in older folks.
She hasn't seen a doctor since last year. She had a regular check up via Skype recently. When we told the doctor about the swallowing and such her suggestion was to watch her closely at meal time. And maybe look into trying the thickener. But she has issues with any liquids from water to heavy cream based soup.
I am thinking that at the risk of hurting someone's feelings I need to start feeding her my self. Maybe if they see that it does work I can get them on board.
Eating an acceptable diet and even more important, safe swallowing, are pretty important life needs.
Might their comfort level extend to placing one manageable bite on her plate, allowing her to consume it, then repeating the action?
”They” may not want to assume direct responsibility for feeding, but it may be time to be paying someone to come at meal time (s) and help her.
She sure is lucky to have you on her side.
Has she had a swallow eval by a speech pathologist?
If family is not willing to feed her, they should consider more home care or a facility.
Thank you so much for the supportive thoughts.