What do I need to do for Aunt with severe Dementia who is going to the bank and taking money out she cannot afford?
I provided POA to the bank, advice to note her accounts to call me as POA first, but they still gave her funds she wanted. She would get rides from neighbors that do not know her issues and made me seem to be the bad person here. She is physically fit, so looking and talking to her, you would not know she has dementia as she knows how to fib really well. However, I don't want to take the money out of her name due to her getting seriously upset and can hurt herself. Not to mention the verbal abuse she lash out with. Called the bank and they stated, if they really know the person, they will give her the funds. I advised that she does not have ID or bank card to show as I have them in my possesion. Bank teller said she worked in a bank for 30yrs, and they do not need ID or bank card if they know that person. Does anyone know what else I can provide the bank institution other than the POA and noting accts without taking her name off of the accts? Any advice will help.
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1. Bring Dementia diagnosis on Physician "letterhead" signed by her doctor, into the bank, carry it into the bank, physically meet with that branch manager, explaining the withdrawals problem.
2. While providing medical paper-work. Password protect that account.
Every time someone appears to withdraw, they must give that password, add a one line note within the account that states the reason for the password on that account. Add that password in person. visit that Bank often to enable staff to be familiarized with your face. So they visually associate more than your mother with that account.
OR
3. While providing medical paper-work, Close the account to move all funds into a different account at THAT branch (to avoid appearance of deception). Move funds into something similar to an old fashioned interest bearing CD or other bank product, that blocks withdrawals.
Why use the doctor to stay at that bank?? Your mother might be pretending to be a victim of exploitation abuse, telling the bank that you're stealing from her.
Is her diagnosis supported by MRI and/or CT scans? If not, Get her scanned and present copies of those scans with that physcian letter.
In my profession I've had clients with a parent pretending to have impaired memory. That parent's personality type pretends to forget things as part of the parent's lifelong abuse of whomever that parent is specifically faking Dementia symptoms.
That not-impaired parent fakes memory problems, for many reasons including to get their adult children to do things for them, and to exacerbate that adult child. It's bizarre, but happens more often than the most realize.
This is exactly what I needed to know. You are correct in saying the fib to get people to believe them. She told a neighbor things that made them call adult services on me twice, local and state. Thank goodness they deal with this same situation everyday, and dropped the case. Unfortunately, I took her to get an MRI scan and while at the facility she refused, and they told me they could not make her get the MRI. I do believe all your saying is true. I will work on this as soon as possible. Thank you again.
If you feel that handling this in this way will be too upsetting and if you fear your aunt will harm herself if this is done I honestly don't know your options. At some point someone will have to apply as conservator or as guardian before it's too late. Dementia leaves one prey to fraud; the money can go very fast, and I am not talking paying for rides here. Screennamed has some excellent advice below, as well, and moving your Aunts funds into a CD with no early withdrawal without your permission would help with this. I think you need to ask for a personal banker to give you advise within this institution, not the teller who likely knows very little. You could also use Aunt's funds for a one hour consult with an Elder Law attorney on how best to protect her as this dementia progresses. Remember, her conferring POA on you doesn't really mean that she can't make her own decisions and handle her own money unless there is a diagnosis of dementia that precludes such a thing.