I live with my elderly mom, and she is and always has been very critical. I have a few friends who come over and when they leave, she always has something to say about them. They are too fat, or too much of a know-it-all, or whatever. I did say to her this morning, "Well you have never liked any of my or my siblings friends". She said nothing to my comment. She doesn't have very many friends of her own, and always had been a loner. It is also difficult to put up with her criticism. Nothing is ever good enough, nor will it ever be. Do you have any suggestions for me?
a week. Some parents forgo parenting and instead use their children as glorified servants and emotional trash cans. I tried jollying a toxic parent and toxic in laws for
years to no avail. Every single person I've spoken to in person or online can attest to
the fact that tolerating constant criticism is toxic and does nothing to change the other person. In fact, since they can dump all of their angst on you, it makes it even less
likely they will change, but highly likely you will suffer both financially and physically
as toxic criticism will inevitably wear you down.
If your Mom has memory issues, it is best to just agree with her. By agreeing with her, it will make you feel like you won as that stops any further arguments, and by agreeing with her, Mom will feel like she got the upper hand. It's a win-win for both of you.