This may be a sensitive subject but I need to ask. The caregivers on these forums - of which I am one - are able to vent and find possible solutions to the problems of caregiving but what happens after the family member passes on. Do you finally get your life back and find some peace? I am sure that most of us would say this has been worth it but I would love to hear from the folks that have gone thru this and come out the other end. Do you still come to the forum?
I have been able to slowing get some much needed sleep and I am finding peace with his passing. I am proud I was able to care for him at home and he felt loved each day of his life. However, I am older myself and now have to sort out the rest of my life. Do I continue to work full time or do I retire? If I retire what do I do with my time? Being a full time caregiver with a full time job, figuring out what to do with my time was not a problem prior to my dad's passing. There is a sense of let down once the parent passes but if your parent is elderly you know in your mind that death is the last chapter. No one lives forever and most elderly understand this even if they don't say so.
I have refrained from big changes, moves --purchases etc. I think it takes a while to understand what you really want to do after such a death in the family.
I would suggest going so and do what feels right. Holidays, Christmas is a challenge for me so I am doing what I feel up to doing. However, it is a different Christmas without either parent alive and I realize it.
When it comes, you will be ok. If you can be a caregiver, you are a very strong person and will manage fine. As far as visiting this site, I didn't have time to visit this site until my father had passed.
Elizabeth
Both Mom and Dad (especially Mom) wanted to continue living at home for as long as possible. Since Mom had multiple healthcare issues, including uncontrollable seizures, I think it was best to have as much one-on-one attention and towards the end, it was two-on-one attention.
I, too, am interested to find out what happens when both parents are gone. How do you get your life back?