I just returned from a three week break from giving care for my 95 year old Mother. She seems to have lost her speech and moving ability. She has had a series of strokes over the last three years. Each on takes something from her. Now she sleep deeply and I have to be persistent to have her wake up to eat. Her pulse and pressure are good. I was wondering if she is just withdrawing and getting ready to die. What is the quasi normal dying process?
www.agingcare.com/articles/end-of-life-care-for-dying-loved-one-123287.htm
There are also lots of resources on the site and online if you do a search of your question.
Then she fell and broke her pelvis and was put on morphine and tranquilizers to keep her in bed and pain free. The last few weeks of her life, she mostly slept and there were times we thought she was dead or unconscious as she couldn't be roused. Part of her sleeping all the time was age, morphine and mostly just winding down. She stopped eating and drinking the last week.
Nature had a way of knowing when it is time. It may sound callous, but it is actually better it happened this way, quietly and painlessly because she was completely deaf and her dementia was accelerating. Another two years of living as a vegetable with someone changing her diapers and trying to feed her is not what she would have wanted.
I keep my eyes open for information about end of life, because my cousin has so many traits yet, her vitals are good. She can't walk, but she does move her feet around in her wheelchair. She eats well, but has lost weight. She doesn't have much muscle, if any. You can see the decline, both mental and physical. The doctors have said she's not ready for Hospice. Still....I just don't know... Will they come to me and say that she is now LATE and FINAL stage? I do read that they describe her as SEVERE in all her medical records.
Never in my life did I think I would be facing such a life changing situation as my sister dying before my mom and me comforting mom, instead of the other way around.
I pray mom doesn't suffer long, and dies peacefully in her sleep. Then I can finally grieve the loss of both of them.
I think the dying process varies from person to person depending what their underlying conditions are but there are some things that most people experience when they are near the end. Others on here could probably help you better than I.
With my Mom I kept looking for the signs I was told to expect but they never happened.