Both my sister and a long time friend live on the opposite coast, so I can inly help from afar. Both routinely get packages from me a week or more after USPS confirms delivery, and after repeatedly asking for it. My friend told me today that staff “needs to check the mail first”. He confirmed they open it. My sister’s may too. I said “why? You’re not in prison!” And he meekly replied that he knows and doesn’t like it.
I informed them of the federal regulations regarding patient privacy and prompt mail delivery, but both are afraid to rock the boat, for fear of abuse. So they anxiously await needed packages and gifts while I worry about the possibility staff hold off to see if they can steal the mail.
I will likely contact governing agencies and state representatives about this but I’m curious if anyone else has experienced it? Had any success addressing it?
I’m not just concerned about these two, but the practice in general. It is illegal and a form of patient abuse.
I found this website after looking for information on it and found two conversations started by others it happened to, so this can’t be rare or isolated incidents. In one case, the victim had a check stolen and cashed, yet a reader blamed her, saying she must have “forgotten” receiving and giving away a check , and in the other, the ever handy excuse “short staffed” was used. Blame and excuses don’t fly with me.
Given that it us the holiday season, consider this a heads up too, if you ship to a live in facility
But you don't want to rock the boat---Maybe call the PO that services this NH and let them know. One branch of our gov't that is pretty 'tough' is the PO!!
I don't even open my HUSBAND'S mail!!!!!!!!!!!!! (neither does he, but that's a whole other story!)
How comfortable are you with talking to the director the facility? Do you fear repercussions if you make a stink about this? I can see that.
Maybe just a phone call to alert the facility that you're aware of this and letting them know you're not going to stand for it--IDK how much you can push w/o your LO's suffering some blowback.
This is kind of a new question--I hope others will have the answers. I truly would be so angry if this were happening to me!
(Just a thought: IS there someone where you LO's are who could receive their mail 'as in care of' and then they bring the mail to facility? Yes, it creates a bit of a hassle for the family/friend, but at least the mail isn't being tampered with.)
About Me
I live across the country from a sister and a friend ( in 2 different West coast states) who are both disabled and need help getting proper care. Both are on dialysis.
My sister is my main concern. She oppositional defiant ( life long) and a hoarder. These have gotten her kicked out of an assisted living facility and a homeless shelter, snd she is currently living in a motel, on the government dime, and sabotaging efforts to get her into another assisted living facility.
I am the only family member willing to help my sister and she’s burned her last friend. I do not have POA or any access to any of her social workers or medical staff.
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What "staff" where is "checking mail" and opening it? In a motel? You put your question under Assisted Living but say your sister lives in a "motel on the government dime" which is new to me. Who regulates what the desk staff do in motels, I don't know?
In my parents Assisted Living facility, they had their own mailbox which USPS mail was delivered into daily by USPS mail delivery people. Nobody had access or keys to their mailboxes but THEM. Large packages and flowers were dropped off at the reception desk and the resident was called w/i an hour to pick up their unopened package. These are not "patients" in AL but residents. Every time I or family members have shipped a gift to my folks, it was received w/o issue, and no mail was ever stolen or tampered with.
Best of luck contacting governing agencies and state representatives about this unfortunate situation.
When Mom was in a NH, the only mail I had sent there was her Medicaid stuff upon request. I signed that it was OK for the facility to open this mail. All other mail was sent to my home and I took it to her.
No facility, without written permission, should be opening any residents mail. If a clerk at a hotel is doing it, that is really a no no even if the government is paying for a room. I would tell everyone involved that without permission in writing they cannot open mail and it must be delivered to the resident the day it is received. Check with ur PO for regulations.
I would keep addressing this through the administration. I am not certain about this policy of opening the mail of other people if they are themselves competent? Now a facility with many who are NOT competent may be doing checking for any number of reasons. For instance my brother's ex used to order large quantities of listerine to replace the liquor he was missing. There may be people forgetful to the extent they don't realize they GOT their mail, so things may be checked?
I might consider asking for an omsbudsman to contact me and work with me and facility.
As to working for "other people" on this, I think you will be well advised to stick to your own folk, because that's going to be hard enough as it is.
Sure do wish you the best of luck in this and hope you will update us. Clearly this is an odd rule and clearly they are not well enough staffed to handle the mail for their facility.