As I wrote on my previous question me and my mother are moving out after 6 years taking care of my grandmother who has dementia. We will not abandon her, my mother and her siblings are taking care of everything to make sure she will be safe, we will also visit as much as we can. My question is, what do I do now that I'm no longer a caregiver? My life revolved around taking care of my grandmother and now I feel so empty and sad... I will need to ocupy my mind and I don't know what to do... Unfortunately I'm not able to work at the moment, it would be a blessing to have a job and actually go to work but I can't because of my poor health, I also can't go out much, I'm battling depression at the moment, I suffer from two chronic conditions that cause me a lot of pain and other terrible physical symptoms every single day and I also suffer from Schizophrenia. What did you do when you stopped caregiving? I'm talking about activities and also about how you dealt with your feelings, what scares me the most is not dealing with this properly, I never knew how to deal with my feelings, I just pretend things never happened and everything is okay, when my grandfather died I kept on going like it was nothing even though I was suffering so much, I ended up with severe anxiety and having constant panic attacks. I wish this was easier...
Think of nice things you can do for her, bring her some simple flowers, pick out a nice card, find a photo of you and your Mom and put it in a nice frame so your grandmother can look at it. Oh my gosh, there can be a lot of things you can do.
If the facility has activities, maybe you can join your grandma in those activities. Ask if you can join your grandmother for lunch or dinner once a week.
And think now your Mother can rest, how much better she will feel, and the both of you can start working on that together :)
it isnt hard to find things to be thankful for . be thankful you arent living in iraq , west africa , syria , afghanistan , palestine , etc . ive mentioned this recently on here . i sat in my garage canning tomatoes a couple weeks ago and suddenly realized that that was where i left off 7 yrs ago when i moved to moms house . i have so much to do that it defies a starting point so ill just have to be content with regaining my life one small piece at a time . ive fruit trees to prune , a 6 k sq ft house to stone , the front of my own house to stone , 30 more qts apples to can , firewood to cut , my kitchen needs rebuilt , old truck needs fresh paint , brakes replaced , and some clown emailed me tonight wanting a sidewalk built with thousand of small river rocks laid in spiral patterns . my challenge is taking small steps so i dont overwhelm my brain .. taking my life back hasnt been a simple change of gears , its the upheaval of a lifetime .
If you do find that you can get out, once in awhile, if you're religious, you could probably find some church group to join. There are free library events in most cities. Many areas have MeetUp groups that are free and you can find all sorts of things that might be interesting to you.
I also read a lot. If you're homebound and like to read, check with your local library. Some library systems have volunteers that will deliver books to the homebound.
Hobbies that can be done at home and that don't need to be expensive would be sewing and needlework. While I do get needlework and some sewing supplies at the thrift stores and garage sales, you can also watch eBay and CraigsList for things to be on-sale or really cheap. CraigsList is kind of iffy, though. Each area has its things that people tend to post and buy and you'd have to see what things are popular in your own area.
Likewise, knitting and crocheting. People get kind of crazy with fancy patterns and yarn, but if you just want to do it to keep busy and maybe make yourself something that's useful, you can still do this at a modest cost.
If you have someone to be in regular contact with, do it. Phone calls are supposed to be better than e-mail. If you have someone you can have some kind of regular friendly chat with, that is supposed to be helpful to those people who like the phone.
I make things at home for charity. I don't spend a lot and it doesn't require me to leave. They're needlework projects. It makes me feel useful.
Do you have a window suitable for bird-watching? Some people really get into this and you can find books for your area to help you look for the right birds.
I love jigsaw puzzles, crossword puzzles and sodoku, all good to do from home.
My local YMCA has a knitting and crocheting group where you make projects to benefit the community. It's free and doesn't require "Y" membership. They supply all the materials and teach you how to do it. I'm planning on trying that, maybe in the next few weeks. I don't mean your community will have the same thing, just giving this as one example of the types of things that communities have available.
What about art? Do you think you'd like to paint or draw? That's something you could take classes in from your home, if you can't get out, and could do at home, too. There are not just those Bob Ross classes that you could probably get from your local library, but probably some others you could buy or download, too.