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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
My term of service will hopefully be coming to an end within days and although I have over a years worth of to-do list I just can’t seem to wrap my mind around enjoying something again.
There wasn't a first thing, first moment that things changed and I started to live again. It was a very gradual process and I am still recovering. Mom passed in June 2017, I had not provided that one on one care for two years. I still am thoroughly enjoying being alone. I have to force myself to go out. It was constant activity, worry, always sensitive to what mom was thinking and doing. What if something happens then what will I do?
Gremlin, just take your time. It is not going to be all of the sudden revelation, wow I am having fun and enjoying myself. Just take your time and you will need that time. Enjoy the lack of constant worry and activity.
Even when someone passes, especially an elderly parent or a spouse, the "sentence" will still continue on for awhile.
For me, my parents hadn't placed everything into a revocable test, so off to Probate I had to go. With the help of my parent's Elder Law Attorney there was paperwork after paperwork for almost two years.... whew !
Then the sale of the house. Oh gosh, what to do with everything. Lot of logistics involved. That in itself was more exhausting then helping my parents when they were still living there.
It's been 2 years since my last parent had passed, and some of the rooms in my house still look like a flea market. I never regained any energy :(
So, I spend quaity time climbing up the family tree via Ancestry, found over 1,500 people, way back then not unusual for couples to have 12 to 15 children, and their children having the same number. Doing this makes me closer to relatives that I rarely saw and relatives I never met :(
For me,I surround myself with life! Mom passed end of July, I spent days at state fair (family poultry),I've had 4 grandsons spend a week. We did things I've never done in my city. Mom was a busy woman until the last 2 years,she was 98. I know she would want to see me active and living a full life. No guilt for me I did what needed done at the time. I miss Mom terribly but a busy life lessens the grief.
There was no first moment as such for me, but this entire year of 2018 has been about finding my way back to a stable and healthy existence. Thyroid medication has helped, I have employment since January that is relatively stress free, and I'm content to allow myself to find a new normal. Things are going well!! I really thought my happiness was gone from life, except for brief moments of escapism, but now I'm content and doing well enough most days! It's wonderful to look forward to my future again because that notion was simply gone for a few years due to several factors, but the demoralization of a dysfunctional caregiving situation was a big factor. Having myriad health problems was another factor. The new medication has helped, I exercise more than previously and eat healthy foods, plus stress is way down and my mind/body are much better off for that being the case.
I wish everyone to find themselves moving towards a content, self focused place after caregiving life has ended. It takes time... but I think caregivers very much deserve to move on with our own lives, and I think that's what Loved Ones would want.
I am assuming you r placing Mom in a NH? That started me feeling free.
When Mom was in the AL, I washed her clothes. I still was responsible for buying her toiletries and personal needs. I handled her finances. That all stopped when she went to a NH. Private pay took the rest of her money. I made the NH her payee for SS and pension. I washed her clothes but saw how clean and smell free the residents were, so handed the job over to the facility. All I had to do was visit, which I did every other day. Everyday the first week or two to get to know the staff and them me. I had a vacation planned in early Oct to visit our southern relatives. (one reason for handing the laundry over to the facility). The only responsibility I had was the sale of the house which still hasn't happened. I had a lawyer helping with that so some stress taken off my shoulders.
It was my Moms passing though, that took a lot of stress away. No more worries. I didn't have to worry about another hospital stay. Making decisions for her, right or wrong. Watching her fade away.
I still have the house. Hopefully, my nephew has found a place to live. Once he moves, there will be a final clean out, the utilities shut off and the house closed up. Since no taxes have been paid, then the township will take over eventually. Close probate and I am done. Other than my husband, I will never be a POA again or an executor to anyones will.
Find somewhere to go and be quiet and rest for a week. Take a book, go for walks. When you get bored, you will get some energy to find your list again.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Gremlin, just take your time. It is not going to be all of the sudden revelation, wow I am having fun and enjoying myself. Just take your time and you will need that time. Enjoy the lack of constant worry and activity.
For me, my parents hadn't placed everything into a revocable test, so off to Probate I had to go. With the help of my parent's Elder Law Attorney there was paperwork after paperwork for almost two years.... whew !
Then the sale of the house. Oh gosh, what to do with everything. Lot of logistics involved. That in itself was more exhausting then helping my parents when they were still living there.
It's been 2 years since my last parent had passed, and some of the rooms in my house still look like a flea market. I never regained any energy :(
So, I spend quaity time climbing up the family tree via Ancestry, found over 1,500 people, way back then not unusual for couples to have 12 to 15 children, and their children having the same number. Doing this makes me closer to relatives that I rarely saw and relatives I never met :(
Mom passed end of July, I spent days at state fair (family poultry),I've had 4 grandsons spend a week. We did things I've never done in my city.
Mom was a busy woman until the last 2 years,she was 98. I know she would want to see me active and living a full life. No guilt for me I did what needed done at the time. I miss Mom terribly but a busy life lessens the grief.
I wish everyone to find themselves moving towards a content, self focused place after caregiving life has ended. It takes time... but I think caregivers very much deserve to move on with our own lives, and I think that's what Loved Ones would want.
When Mom was in the AL, I washed her clothes. I still was responsible for buying her toiletries and personal needs. I handled her finances. That all stopped when she went to a NH. Private pay took the rest of her money. I made the NH her payee for SS and pension. I washed her clothes but saw how clean and smell free the residents were, so handed the job over to the facility. All I had to do was visit, which I did every other day. Everyday the first week or two to get to know the staff and them me. I had a vacation planned in early Oct to visit our southern relatives. (one reason for handing the laundry over to the facility). The only responsibility I had was the sale of the house which still hasn't happened. I had a lawyer helping with that so some stress taken off my shoulders.
It was my Moms passing though, that took a lot of stress away. No more worries. I didn't have to worry about another hospital stay. Making decisions for her, right or wrong. Watching her fade away.
I still have the house. Hopefully, my nephew has found a place to live. Once he moves, there will be a final clean out, the utilities shut off and the house closed up. Since no taxes have been paid, then the township will take over eventually. Close probate and I am done. Other than my husband, I will never be a POA again or an executor to anyones will.