She won't bathe (sometimes for weeks) without a major battle or leave the house anymore. She has begun accusing us of not feeding her, as we are sitting at the dinner table. She is becoming more and more incontinent and difficult. I'm just not sure what to do at this point. I hate the idea of moving her somewhere, and she's aware to know she's being forced from her home, but she's beginning to need 24/7 care. It kills me to even ask, but she won't let us do the basics
There comes a time where an elder needs another layer of care that we can't do... it is for her own safety and for your own sanity.
Will your Mom allow a paid caregiver to come into the home to help her out? Could she afford to pay someone or maybe two caregivers per day? Or would not be an option as some elders refuse to be helped by "strangers".
They can go to the various activities and start enjoying their retirement years instead of sitting home alone doing nothing or depending on paid caregivers or their own grown children to help them. Think about it, a continuing care facility would actually offer one's parent MORE freedom.