My mother lives with my 2 sisters. Neither of them are in great health. One says its time to put her in a nursing home NOW, the other one says NOT YET. I don't live there I live about 40 miles away. I spend at least 3 days a week helping out to give them a break. We have other family members but they offer no real help. My Mother can not get in or out of bed by herself, is in a wheelchair. Wears diapers. Need help cleaning herself. We have hospice coming in to help with shower. Need advice on how I should or should not help with this decision since I don't live there. Also, when do you just know its time?
You might have your mom evaluated by a local healthcare agency to determine what level of care she needs. I would do that immediately, because you want to avoid a situation where there is an emergency and you have nowhere to place her.