My mom is on hospice and I have accepted that she doesn't have long. Most days she doesn't eat, but some times she will. The nurse wants me to stop giving her food and water, but I don't know if I can do that. When do you know it's time to stop giving food and water?
I've read that the patients are not suffering by being refused food and water too and I call bullsh*t on that.
If they are asking for it, it should be given. At least ice chips or sponging or something.
I'm glad we are all here discussing these issues and I'm sorry some are struggling. I do think we try to do what's best and we need to go with our gut, not necessarily what the "professionals" say.
There are a lot of family members forcing food & drink, due to not understanding that it really doesn't help prolong life and can make dying more difficult.
Then I asked the nurse if he is refusing water, what do I do. She said nothing. There is no substitute except for the liquids he is getting in the foods I am giving him. When he stops taking any of the above I will try to get him to take a teaspoon of apple sauce with the pills AT LEAST. He must have the medications to keep the pain down.
He went for two nights without sleeping. He told me he was afraid if he went to sleep he would not wake up. Yet, he has accepted death. We say we do, but there will always be that bit of fear about what happens next.
Fortunately, for us (and not mandatory for others), we have our faith.
So many things are happening that make me know he is talking to someone and discussing the days of his life.