Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
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I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Seriously, call your mother's local elder care services and report your mother's precarious living situation to them. Tell them you have a child to consider. Leave. It's less than two months, you have not formally accepted responsibility for your mother's care, the whole thing is just ridiculous.
I too read your profile, and I can only repeat what Churchmouse has already said. Go home to Tennessee. You may have been groomed for this but you can walk away from it. You may need psychological counseling to help you work through your feelings about it, but you should get that counseling in TN, after you get home.
Of course the doctors told you to stay with her. That solves the problem at no cost to them. Lots of people will tell you things like that. They only have their own best interests at heart, not yours. I believe you should only give up your life to care for someone if you love them enough to want to do it and not consider it a sacrifice. That's clearly not the case here. Monitor your mother from a distance and if she runs into trouble again, call adult protective services. Don't be the human sacrifice. It's not worth it and in the end, it's your life.
Buy your ticket back home today. Contact your former employer and see if you can get your job back. You should be eligible for FMLA, yes? See if the HR department can apply that retroactively to the time you took off.
Crazydae, you are right, there is something more going on with your Mom than just depression. It could be Alzheimer/Dementia, or an urinary tract infection [which can mimic dementia]. Have her doctor run a UTI test on her.
I see that your Mom had hired caregivers and let them go. That tells me she can afford to pay them.
Time to pack up and get back home to TN. By the way, who has Power of Attorney for your Mom? If it is your sister or brother, let whomever deal with Mom. I know you want to do what is best for your Mom, but the environment isn't healthy for you.
As for your boyfriend, good heavens if he is scouting the websites for someone else after two months, he's not worth it. Seriously.
You call Adult Protective Services not to ask about eligibility for services. You call them to say that your mother is living alone and incompetent to care for herself. They need to do a wellness check and perhaps get the ball rolling for the state to assume guardianship.
I'm with Churchmouse! You and I have a very similar situation, except that DSS took my mother from her home and I now have her living in my home. Lord, help us. Dear, you may have a little depression yourself and it is completely understandable. Get out now. Call Adult Protective Services and go home. Get yourself some much needed care. Be strong!
So you were told to look after her, fine. That doesn't have to mean moving in and giving up your own life, you can arrange for her care from your home in TN. Yes, call APS and tell them she is a vulnerable senior who is living in her own home, ALONE.
I called APS when I got here and they can't help. Mother has too many assets and is not eligible for any services. She is very paranoid and believes all the caregivers and house cleaners she hired before that are not family have stole from her.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Er, how do I put this? Oh, I know.
Go home!
Seriously, call your mother's local elder care services and report your mother's precarious living situation to them. Tell them you have a child to consider. Leave. It's less than two months, you have not formally accepted responsibility for your mother's care, the whole thing is just ridiculous.
GO HOME.
Of course the doctors told you to stay with her. That solves the problem at no cost to them. Lots of people will tell you things like that. They only have their own best interests at heart, not yours. I believe you should only give up your life to care for someone if you love them enough to want to do it and not consider it a sacrifice. That's clearly not the case here. Monitor your mother from a distance and if she runs into trouble again, call adult protective services. Don't be the human sacrifice. It's not worth it and in the end, it's your life.
I see that your Mom had hired caregivers and let them go. That tells me she can afford to pay them.
Time to pack up and get back home to TN. By the way, who has Power of Attorney for your Mom? If it is your sister or brother, let whomever deal with Mom. I know you want to do what is best for your Mom, but the environment isn't healthy for you.
As for your boyfriend, good heavens if he is scouting the websites for someone else after two months, he's not worth it. Seriously.