I have been taking care of a friend for over a year now, he never married nor had kids. I did know him almost 3 years prior to becoming more close (as friends). When I went through a very hard time he was there to help me. Something I have always appreciated and will never forget. Now, I started helping him more around the house and since he was a hoarder I cleaned it inside out because he suffers from every illness i can imagine which it helped him tremendously. In the recent months he started to experience health problems and fell several times causing him to bruise, scrape or even have a concussion. Gladly, when the worst fall happen i was around to help and seek medical help immediately. He also attempted suicide in which i seek help and because he gave me power of attorney over his medical decision i knew i had to do something to help him. After getting treatments and all sorta help for everything he has been going through in this last few months I offered him to move in with him. He was abuse as a child and never had a family so i offered him mine. Since moving in I cook, clean, do his laundry. Pretty much everything for him to make him happy and keep him happy. His life has change so much for the best. He is now sleeping more than 10 hours a day when before he was lucky if he sleep 2 hours in a whole 24 hour day. Now, I can keep a closer eye on him in case there is an emergency but most importantly give him the love of a family he never had. But, I have also been getting backslash from his family (who by the way didn't call or visited him in over 10 years). All the sudden they want to know about me and are accusing me or elderly abuse. Not just them but also his car insurance agent. I dare him accuse me without knowing me. The point is i'm completely heart broken because last thing i want is to get in trouble or live a life hearing all this things. I honestly don't know what to do. Breaks my heart to ask him to go back to his home when i get he is much happier around people in a healthier home, with a healthy family. Please give me any type of advise....
P.S. I am not a caregiver and I do not get paid for any of this.
Thank you!
aps suspected that i had some kind of financial motive for getting so involved with my aunt too but when they came to their senses they realized that my aunt only has 2 gold dollars to her name and i gave them to her . their job is to be skeptical first in order to protect the elder until proven differently . aps even suggested that i could buy my aunts shack and property cheaply . they were testing me . man did they get a fooling when i explained to them that i didnt want or need it ..
I'd say just ignore them all! But you also might need to take some steps to protect yourself, depending on what their "charges" are and how articulate your friend is able to be.
And how does the car insurance agent fit it?
Be proud of being such a caring, generous friend. Keep us posted on how this plays out. We are rooting for you!
He was sexually abuse as a child by his own family members (brothers and sisters). He is consider disable since birth. He can walk and do everything on his own. Over the years he took care of his mother until she passed in 2003. He has feed himself frozen tv dinners for the last decade and has been suffering so many illness. I mean he takes about 14 pills a day and his health has improved since now i'm controlling his diet by feeding him homemade food, giving him fresh vegetable and fruits. I avoid anything that could hurt him or that is not good for him. His health has improve so much. He was suffering from depression and like I mention in my question he attempted to suicide. Was in a mental hospital (since he was consider suicidal) for a little over a week. His family never visited him and they knew what had happen since i did informed one of them. The state was very supported since it was also tough for me to see him suffer and since i didn't know how to help. Eventually, he overcame all of those demons and for the first time i introduce him to God, now I take him to church twice a week and he loves it. HE is changing for the best and it's so obvious. I see his life as tragic and I feel it is about time he is happy. He is 74 but seems much older. it's not easy living with a senior (can't lie) but I know in my heart I have to be there for him to help him find a little happiness. I may find myself trouble with his family or whoever but if this is my pay for trying to help someone be happy then I will have to deal with it. I rather face that, than not sleep since my conscious will not let me forgive myself for giving up so easily.