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Wife with moderate dementia sleeps a lot goes to bed about 7:30 PM gets up in the morning 9:00 eats breakfast and then naps all morning till noon. Should I let her sleep or try to keep her busy.?

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You don't say if she is taking any medications that might make her drowsy. She needs to be engaged with life and sleeping a lot is either depression and/or meds. With moderate dementia she should still be able to go for walks. It is good for you and her, and besides lying in bed is very bad on the kidneys. If she's sleeping, she is not hydrated and this causes more problems. So had a talk with her doctor and tell him/her how much she is sleeping, whether a med can be discontinued, or reduced, and get her moving...My husband is 90 yrs. and I keep him walking even if it is in the apt. Try to stay vertical!
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My mom will soon be 91 and has significant vascular and fronto-temporal dementia. We find that if I take her for a 30 min walk in her wheelchair around noon and her caregivers take her for a second walk around 3-4:00, that mom stays awake, alert and less sleepy during the day. She still wants to go to bed around 8 and sleeps for at least 12 hours at night. If the weather is a problem then the caregivers drive her to the local mall or to the Wellness Center at her Senior Center for some additional stimulation and reason to stay awake and alert.
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Good advice here--have her meds checked. Also, it would probably help a lot to lower her carbohydrates (starches and sugars) and up her healthy fats (pure butter, olive oil, coconut oil). The brain and metabolism need healthy fats to function properly.
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How old are you? What kind of shape are you in? Do you have the stamina to keep her busy?
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If she is over 80, I wouldn't worry about it. If she is younger, look at all the medications she is taking and ask the pharmacist if the meds are supposed to be spread out more to avoid sleepiness.
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My mother is 93 & takes no medications. She gets up around 9 AM has breakfast & watches DVD until 12. She takes a nap from 12 to 4 gets up, has dinner & stays up until 7 or 8. She has a snack(ice cream or fruit or jelly donut) before going to bed which seems to help her sleep.
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Sleeping like this could be a sign of depression.
I have always said if I were diagnosed with dementia or any fatal disease for that matter I would be depressed so it would figure that most people may feel that way.
Talk to her doctor, neurologist or GP and discuss this possibility. But she should also be evaluated for other problems.
Also are you sure she is sleeping from 7 pm to 9 am? Could she be lying awake scared about what is going on? Waking up and not knowing for sure where she is?, who you are? what day it is, year it is, month it is? These are frightening thoughts.
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My Mom is 96 with MCI and short-term memory loss. Severe osteoporosis limits her mobility and makes her at high risk for falling & broken bones. She goes to bed around 8-8:30 and sleeps to about 10 am. However, she needs to get up during the night 3 or 4 times to use the toilet and drink water because she's thirsty. Also naps in the afternoon. She has round-the-clock care at home. She gets around the house with a walker, with the aide right behind to catch her if she falls. Watches TV most of her waking hours.l My brother thinks she'd be better off at a NH or ALF so she'd have more activity and interact with more people. Really? Why should she have to get up by 8 am to have breakfast with other people, play bingo, sing kiddy songs, etc.? She doesn't have any meds other than a baby aspirin daily. I wouldn't worry about the sleep habits as long as she's hydrated,not getting bed sores, etc. I know that with my mother, her short-term memory makes it sometimes hard to keep up a conversation, but the aides tell me she often talks about her family growing up and her time in the Army back during WWII. I have just accepted that this is her "new normal".
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Does she sleep through the night, too? You could have the doctor check her meds to see if they have sleepiness as side effects.......other than than, what do you have in mind for her to do? To 'keep busy'? Getting up to walk is very good, for anyone. Do you want to take her outside for walks? .... Sort socks, shell peas, play trivia, dance, do exercises?... That's the trouble with old people who are determined to stay in their own houses till they die. Their lives are get up, go to the toilet, eat, watch tv. eat, go to the toilet, nap. go to the toilet, watch tv, eat, watch tv. go to the toilet, go to bed. Either sleep or get up three times to go to the toilet.,, Their exhausted caregiver is dancing attendance upon them, trying to keep up with the constant toileting and changing Depends, plus everything ELSE to keep the house going. Being the Entertainment Committee, Personal Trainer, and Cheery Companion, too? God bless you, LW. I do know how you feel ... That's what it boils down to. Eating, sleeping, watching tv in between potty breaks - what else do they have to do? Maybe church people can stop over to visit, or a neighbor can bring their dog for a visit, or a grandchild can read to them....I know I'm being sidetracked here, the question was not 'What Can I DO To Keep Her Busy,' but 'Should I TRY To Keep Her Busy.' Even if you could send her to some day care program, that could give her something of interest to look forward to, but what if she sleeps through the whole thing?....Bringing us back to, ask the doctor to check her medications to see if they are making her sleepy! Good luck, LW, this question is more than it seems.
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So many good comments in this group. Without more details like age, where is she at with her dementia, medications, it's hard to give a good answer. My mom is 81 and moving into the later stage of dementia. I try to keep her moving as much as possible. I feel very strongly about keeping my mom moving. There are times where she does want to sleep way too much and then other times she's not happy I get her up but she eventually settles down and the day continues on. It is difficult to keep her moving some days because she is not able to walk far but a wheelchair is a great substitute to get her out and moving. She can't be around more than 1 or 2 people or she gets highly agitated, so day cares are not an option. As someone else said, if she sleeps all the time she is not hydrating, moving or eating. That is not good. Good luck, our thoughts and prayers are with you. Above all, make sure you are taking care of yourself :).
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