I feel guilty every time the thought enters my mind. Is there anyone else that has ever thought/wished their loved one would just pass on when there is no treatment options available? I am thinking this more and more as the days pass....I know I am burned out and that is part of it....the main part though is Dad is not living a quality life anymore. He went from being independent to having to have at least 2 people attending to him always. He's bed ridden for the most part. He does get into the wheelchair some times but it takes 2 people to get him there. It's just sad......and I can tell it really bothers him.
I feel very guilty thinking that way but as the days pass and he is getting weaker and weaker physically, and the wear and tear it has had on myself/family, I am thinking and praying more and more that Dad passes sooner rather than later........
Imagine this family member at the prime of their lives who is taking care of someone who is in the current stage they are now in...what would your dad think or say? Would your dad say 'this person should pass on over now, this is cruel to allow such suffering?'.
There is your answer.
We see a family member who is completely without their mind, wasted away to a skeleton, physical ailments, may be in pain, completely bed-ridden, bed sores, breathing problems, unable to do one single thing for themselves, incontinent, diaper rash, can't turn themselves over-have to be turned to prevent more bed sores...and you think 'what sort of quality of life is this!'. NO, you are not guilty for wanting this person to pass, you want peace for them, for you, for the family. Don't ever let anyone tell you differently.
It would be hypocritical of me to claim a literal belief in the power of prayer because much as I would like to I just don't. But I certainly do believe that placing your trust and faith in your God, especially if you have a strong belief, will give you consolation; and that is why I would recommend it. What's more, the peace of mind you may get from that is likely to filter through to your loved one, which can only be a good thing.
And if that line of argument doesn't help, try this: thoughts come unbidden, and you cannot prevent them, and you cannot be blamed for them. Let them be and then let them go.
I think, if one wishes for someone to die - because they're suffering - then it's not bad. You just want them to stop suffering. But, I would let them die on their own terms. Let's hope they're not like my mom who lived years longer than what most professionals thought she should have died.