I am posting this in burnout as this is as stressful as it was when she lived with me. So I moved my mother to an ALF about a year and a half ago. Her funds are not lasting as long as I planned out. To keep her there I'd have to chip in $1k a month, which is a lot. In addition, it is getting tougher and tougher for her to walk to the dining room which they require and she is not capable of managing a wheelchair.
She does not qualify for Medicaid, she's just above the limits in our state.
Did anyone take their parent back in? I just do not think I can do that, again.
I was going to consult a lawyer as I read it may be possible to put her SS and/or pension into a trust to be used towards her care but it would also put her at the income level to qualify for Medicaid and then I could move her to a nursing home.
Any advice, recommendations would be appreciated.
From what you post Mom really needs 24/7 care. I think a lawyer versed in Medicaid would be a good idea. Some states have a Miller trust where the overage can be put there every month. I think it reverts to Medicaid upon death.
You have have options other than bringing Mom back to your home, especially if it didn’t work out before. Make sure this time, when you choose a facility, you ask her doctor what they feel Mom’s prognosis is. Does she have dementia and might require Memory Care? Then, the facility you chose should also have a Memory Care Unit attached.
Butnfirst, do as you planned and see an attorney who specializes in Medicaid.
while I do not have this exact experience, I would strongly suggest you do as you said and seek the advice of an elder care attorney and see what all your options are.
not judging your situation or relationship with your mom, but I would make bringing her back to your house the absolute LAST resort, I do know how it is to be in the situation where you don’t have enough to make it, but just enough not to qualify for help...
sorry I don’t have more helpful info but I think you are on he right path to find out, keep us posted
I think seeking qualified legal /elder advice is your first best option. And while I don't know your particular circumstances, I can say that my first and firm recommendation is NOT to resume dual living arrangements. Probably was not the best the 1st time around, and I can guarantee it will only be worse now. The burdens are just too great.
I do wish you the best in searching for a viable solution.
This Medicaid Waiver thing is very confusing and I wish I’d enlisted the help of an attorney.
Good luck. I hope it all works out for you and Mom.
The woman we hired charges by the hour- no minimum or contract. I found her name on this website. https://www.aginglifecare.org/
I did have her assessed before she was placed in the assisted living facility, that is mandatory. So it is not that she wasn't placed properly, she has just deteriorated, and at the time it was determined she didn't need to be in a NH. In addition, we live in a pay down state for medicaid. Basically she has to exhaust her savings before we could do the trust.
Thanks again.
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