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I was offered a room to rent in the home of an older male, who I knew 10 years ago from business. I made it clear this was a temporary arrangement while I was planning to move out of state. When I arrived at his home, he answered the door in his walker. The house is filthy. I broke out in a rash from bedsheets and he yelled at me for stripping the bed to do a load of laundry late at Night, that was not "a full load" I can feel steel bed springs poking me, he said the bed is 30 years old. He started eating all my food, all my groceries, and when I caught him in the kitchen eating my birthday cake, he said "so f'n what, I ate it, go fn buy yourself another one!" and walked away. He wears the same clothes for over a week, smells horrid , eats food standing at kitchen counter and drools. He does not allow doors or windows open, turns ac and heat off at night. He said he does not allow ice cubes or for me to use the ice maker in the freezer! He said he wants me to apply to the state to be his caretaker. I said NO WAY, he was dishonest about having me as a roommate.I stay in my room and avoid him whenever possible. I have caught him lurking in the hallway in the dark peeking in my bedroom, he demands I get up and cook him something or drive him to the store. He gets verbally abusive when confronted, so I can no longer say anything he foams at the mouth, screams and swears so loud the neighbors hear it. The lady next door told me he is evil, and that I'd be better off on my own and get out. The last woman who lived here packed up and left one day while he was not home. He called me every vulgar name the c word, the b word. Now, he poops all over the bathroom and goes back to bed like nothing happened. I have stepped in it half asleep, or had to clean it up in the am. Lately, all he does is sleep 75% of the day or watch tv or porn in the living room. He cant remember if he took his pills, is diabetic and eats a package of cookies a day. I cannot take this verbal abuse and filth...am going to domestic abuse counseling right now until I can get out. I am having panic attacks and have been at the Hospital several times. What else legally can I do? His family want nothing to do with him.

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Move out.

Move out first and figure out what to do after you are safely out.

How soon will you be moving out of state? Where can you stay until then? YWCA? Low-cost motel? Almost anything would be better than this abuse.

I feel sorry for the old guy. I really do. He is probably mentally ill and didn't ask for his situation. But he is not a fit landlord and he is not your responsibility.

Get out. Can the domestic abuse counselors suggest some place for you to go?

Report the situation to Adult Protective Services. But first, Get Out.
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Thank you for your reply.

I am in process of quietly getting things ready to move. I already have my travel expenses covered. Waiting to hear on apt approval. I cant go to a shelter, I have 2 pets. At this point, living in my car would be better than this madness.

Yes, going to report everything to the authorities after I leave, so he can never hurt another person ever again....he needs to be locked up somewhere and psych evaluated.
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Honestly, I do not feel sorry for this man, he has $2K month retirement income, and there is no reason why he cannot hire a housekeeper or buy his own food. He is wallowing in despair of his own situation...
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He is mentally ill. This is not volitional. Get out asap and call Adult Protective Services because he is a vulnerable adult and a danger to himself, not because he is "evil".
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Sunnyflower, you gave us a very valuable lesson for everyone who is thinking about moving into a place without first previewing the home.

Whatever you do, try not to blame him. Sounds like he has dementia/Alzheimer's and he cannot control what he is doing.
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Contact an abused woman's shelter (or men's shelter) if you're a man and see if you can get temporary housing until the apartment is available. Ask someone at the counseling center you're going for domestic abuse to help you find a place ASAP, and even help if possible to move your things out.

Contact a rescue group and ask if there's anyplace your pets can reside for a few weeks until you're re-settled. At least that way you could go to a shelter. It's better than living in a hell hole.
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Sunnyflower, there is an obvious difference in expectations between the two of you. The man is very ill, that too would have been obvious. Seems like leaving will take care of you. Sometimes, we just cannot help, and are actually in the way of someone getting the help they need by the little helps we provide or by standing by. I am talking about picking someone up off the walkway and helping them home after they have fallen 4 times, then they refused help or gone to the hospital. When 911 comes, they take them to the hospital, mostly, or at least assess if they are able to safely be left alone. Let the professionals help him, it is no longer compassionate to be there even though it seems like it would be, doesn't it?
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Forget legal, forget refunds on rent, don't pay the rent, just leave. Foaming at the mouth? Literally? It is possible that this is schizophrenia. Additionally, I would worry he could poison the dogs. At least, board the dogs. We all make mistakes, or poor decisions at times. I would sleep in my car, board the dogs, what are you waiting for? Is there camping or a state park you can go to?
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The man certainly needs help. Obviously, something is going on that is making him mentally unstable. It's not that he's mean, his brain is not working right. I hope this realization can give you some peace of mind. You are right to get out, but I would alert professionals as to his condition. He sounds like he is not able to care for himself any longer.

Are you asking if you can seek damages from him? Considering he is likely not competent, I don't know if it's a can of worms I would want to open. I guess it would depend on the amount of damages.
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When you arrive at your destination, get some supportive services and counseling for yourself to improve your circumstances and your life. You deserve better than to feel you have to enter a filthy house, sleep in an infested bed, be ordered around by anyone and then comply. Something is very wrong (before you moved in) and I would like for your life to be better, very soon.
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Why are you still there?
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Here's an update that I found, looks like the original poster is still in the same living condition as she was over a year ago. https://www.agingcare.com/questions/Caregiver-driving-expenses-212984.htm
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To me it sounds like he could have out of control diabetes and the brain problems that come from it. People with diabetes who do not control their blood sugar can get totally crazy acting. Over time the brain is damaged (metabolic and vascular dementia) and the damage can be irreparable. You are not responsible for this man, but only for yourself. The conditions are terrible. I agree with everyone else -- get out. It will not get better and there is no way that you'll be able to change things. You'll just become a bullied maid servant to a person who doesn't have the ability to care about anyone but himself.
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He sounds deranged and could be dangerous. Find a place to stay in the interim (I understand the dilemma when you have pets, but you could talk to social services and see if they can find you a motel room - many motels take pets) I would not let him know you are leaving. Make sure your rent or whatever is paid up (hopefully you kept records, cancelled checks) and slowly secretly move everything out to your new place. Then when he is distracted or busy, leave. Just leave a note for him that you have vacated. Don't get into a confrontation with someone who is deranged.
Yes, its a good idea to notify social services because he needs help, but only after you are out of harms way.
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