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Oh sorry CM have a good day and I know what I would be putting in the "stollen" like you bake for her?? yeh been there good old kaz will make a great curry well as we say here "the worm has turned" im doing ZIPPIDY ZIP!! Yep taking back my power!
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Kazzaa if it weren't for being able to tell you about it I'd be crying not laughing, but you know what? - She's been here 15 minutes and already she's flatly contradicted me. She says I'm not making stollen because it hasn't got marzipan in it. I must be making challah instead, she says. Excuse me?! a) You obviously know nothing about either of these foodstuffs. b) Challah, which you just mispronounced, is nothing like stollen, which you also mispronounced. c) This stollen has poppy seed filling in it because I know you don't like marzipan.

Deep breath!!! Back I go… (Yes I know, why on earth am I bothering? Because I like eating it anyway. She can please herself.)
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Countrymouse - At a time like that, my beloved departed but never saintly father would say, "You're entitled to your opinion, however ignorant and benighted it may be." I use it all the time, usually with a laugh. It makes me feel so much better.
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Thanks Jinx! - I'll stick to thinking it, for the sake of world peace, but it'll still make me smile.

Do you know, she only bloody checked up when she got home, didn't she! And was gracious enough - not to admit that she was wrong (let's not be silly) - to email me and let me know that I could buy poppy seed stollen at the East German supermarket chain she'd been recommending earlier on. Very good for people on a tight budget, apparently.

I think that's her version of being nice. She'll be back in a fortnight or so. I'm not sure if that was a threat or a promise...
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It's a threat!
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cm is there any way you can be out of the house at least most of the time, when she comes? As if it wasn't hard enough caring for an oldster with serious problems, without adding a dysfunctional sib into the mix.
jinx -good saying from your dad
Kazzaa - glad you are standing on your hind legs and have taken your power back - Illegitimi non carborundum (don't let the b*st*rds grind you down)
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Emjo, I did make one breakthrough: bursting for the loo while my mother was already in the other bathroom, so handed sister the CareAssist alarm and asked her to keep watch. The girl done good, no bones broken, just a slightly anxious expression on mother's face as they made their way back to the living room so I said thank you and took over. I don't blame sister for not doing the hands-on bit, it's not what she's good at. It's also partly why I wouldn't leave mother alone with her, not fair to either of them.

But I think the main thing is, I could have been my mother if I didn't have my father's temper - in my case the desperation for approval cuts off once the sense of fair play (or sense of humour) kicks in; in hers it rules her entire life. But, so, I can see that my mother irritates my sister in exactly the same way that I do, except that my sister feels even less inhibited when it comes to ordering my mother around. No, I won't be leaving them alone together for long, though I do try to give them some privacy. It's taking me every waking moment to try to help my mother heal, I'm not letting a few unthinking critical remarks - well-meant, of course - undo months of hard, delicate work.
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I understand - you cannot leave your sis with that responsibility for other than a few moments.
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