What to do about a POA who won't communicate with family?

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What to do about a POA who won't communicate with family?

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I have a dysfunctional family (sister is a nut and married to a nut) and, because of that, my parents appointed their rather new attorney at main POA and their accountant as Financial POA. The only thing my name is on is Medical Care Proxy. It is creating problems for me now that my father has died. My mother has some dementia and is in an Indpt/Assisted Living facility. Her dementia is not bad....she knows what's going on, just repeats herself alot. She has LTC insurance and they recently denied her claim for in- home health care assistants, claiming they weren't "licensned." Meanwhile, they have paid similar claims for other residents at the same facility, using the same aides. I want to file an appeal, and I felt an appeal coming from her POA would hold more weight than submitting it myself. I have contacted attorney several times, both by email and phone (of course, he is always "out of the office.") This has been going on for a month. No replies. I sent to his office all the info he will need to file an appeal; no response. He is getting paid quarterly to "monitor" my deceased father's estate! Now I'm wondering just exactly what he is (or is not) doing. Can I get rid of him? Or am stuck? The financial POA is fine; he does communicate with me when I need his advice. I feel like my parents have put me in a "no power" position because of my sister, and now I am having trouble trying to get my mother help when she needs it. Can I fire the durable power of attorney? If my mother tries to do it, will they say she is not in her right mind because of dementia? I can't consult nutty sister; haven't talked to her since my father died 5 years ago. Thanks in advance for any help.

Power of Attorney (POA)

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TheFixer is correct. We had the same problem with the POA of my cousin who was diagnosed with early Alzheimer’s. The POA involved her husband in the decision-making and they, as well as my cousin’s attorney, had questionable motives. Upon investigation, I found they were all a little too close for comfort, and we found they had ulterior motives for wanting to keep her in a facility where she was very unhappy. They refused to entertain the idea of moving her to a more appropriate facility that we had checked out, and even walked out on the discussion. We found another attorney who confirmed that, since my cousin was never declared incompetent, she could change her POA if she desired. It just so happened she wanted to change it, because she had not really trusted this woman for a while – even before things got bad for her - but being a non-confrontational person, she didn’t want to rock the boat in their friendship. We were successful in helping her make the change, and for months afterward, my cousin reiterated how relieved she was that this woman was out of the picture. A trustworthy relative has since taken over the position of POA and is doing a wonderful job. I just wish I had listened to my cousin’s complaints and acted on them before everything went as far as it did. She never should have been placed in that position. At least we were able to remedy it. Best of luck with your situation!

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Your mother can go to an attorney and have her POA changed, unless she has been declared incompetent. You need to read the documents and see if it is a durable Power of Attorney or not, and if not what conditions put it in effect. The POA for your father ended with his death and the executor of his will would have been in control of following his will. If you know a good attorney go there first. Best Wishes.

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I agree (I was a legal secretary for many years). Something stinks here no attorney waits an entire month unless they are in trial (and even then, they have someone else get back to you). The best thing to do is call your local Bar Association for a referral to an Elder Law attorney. It cost $25 for 30-60 minutes. Don't use Avvo. They are a paid service and are not objective. Make sure he does litigation (ice called several re my brother and they didn't do litigation). No one ever follows my advice on here, but I worked in this field for over 20 years. But I definitely think something stinks with this guy.

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Make sure the POA has permission to reveal to you. My mom did not allow that, even though she lived with me.

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Start with Ombudsman for the county and request that they go into the facility and talk to her mother and determine what your mom wants 2) then the Ombudsman can contact the lawyer and state that he needs to communicate with the family 3) If the lawyer still fails to communicate with Ombudsman and family then you can choose to file a complaint with Adult Protective Services and say the POA has failed to communicate with both family and Ombudsman 4) you can then contact American Bar Association and file a complaint against him and tell them the situation start with the Ombudsman first.

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Before spending a lot of time and money on an appeal, read the policy very thoroughly. If the policy pays for home care for licensed only, then that is what they need to see to pay the benefit. Some companies..ie my mother's policy offered a rider - expensive..that would pay for any home care....so the other residents may have that and not the same policy asyour mother..or there may be other reasons...but insurance companies go by the letter of the policy. Your $ may be better spent getting her licensed care they will pay for. You say she is in "ind/assisted living but you want payment for home care. That is 3 separate types of care. She is either ind, assisted living or receiving home care. Ltc policies will not pay for independent living. Make sure you have applied for the benefit appropriately under her policy. If you have proof of her eligibility as requested under the terms of the policy, they will pay. Talk to the insurance company first.

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don't know exact answer to this buy you might want to check with an Elder Care Attorney who specializes in these things. At least you will get the legal aspect of this.

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Maybe you could get the POA back when a contract (yearly?) is up. As POA, one should be required to file a monthly report of activity (or lack of). No activity is no reason for no pay, a retainer is a valid fee. A phone conversation with advice or at least a half hour verbal activity check ought to be part of the contractual obligation, but to whom does the POA report? A court? Once you are POA, you should not have to deal with your family any more than the current POA does (or should). You could write a contract that specifies how often you will contact them with a status. Specify that contact is to be made only when necessary or on a defined schedule. Don't let them bully you into submission as has currently happened it seems. Good luck and don't give up. With a silent POA, the NH can get away with anything, and they probably know it.

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You can't lump every LTC policy together. Policies are different. Coverage is different. Depending on the state, assisted livings have certificates, not licenses. Shame on any attorney for ignoring you. Make an appointment. He might take you more seriously.

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You can bypass all this if you go to court for guardianship of your mother.......
If the POA is not doing their job. If there is going to be a fight you will need $2,500.00 retainer to start. MAKE SURE you get a Elder Care Attorney for sure.

What to do about a POA who won't communicate with family?

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