I was told that there were others here who had lost the person they were caring for and was referred to the Totally Grossed Out threat and the How Are You Doing Today thread but these threads have tens of thousands of comments. How do I get to the most recent comments without having to read 29,000 other comments?
I hope you meant to type "on" and not "off" ;-)
What a mean thing to say hardass. I know for a fact that no one has ever been mean to you on the grossed thread and I have enjoyed your comments here and there on the site.
til now. guess you're just another hater. *sigh*.
It must be exhausting trying to live up to that name.
It's ok I have been jumped on by a few but just have to shake it off. Caregiving is tough and it can make us say mean stuff depending on the day we're having.
Many of us continue to hang out with good friends we have made and continue to make as we provide support to other caregivers past and present as they provide support for us.
We see new folks all the time who land on us because that title reflects how they feel for that moment just like it reflected how I felt over 3 years ago when I caught mom with that toothbrush.
Life does go on but one thing remains the same: Caregiving is hard and we take our support where we can find it. Whether it's the grossed thread or whatever thread you write on is not what's important. What's important is that you get it out of you and onto a thread so another human being can say: I hear you. You are not alone and you are welcome here.
Most folks on this site write on many!
There's a lovely post from another caregiver who gets us on my wall. I am gratified to read those now and again because it makes me feel good to know that we helped someone through a tough time in their lives. I sure wish there had been something like that when I started out caregiving but I didn't find this site until over 5 years into the game and by that time major decisions had been made due to operating in a vacuum because of no support at all.
So ya, that's my 'ego' talking. For those who get us, thanks. For those that don't, hope you feel better by attacking me.
lovbob
So--how did you get the cat pee out of a mattress ? I had to toss a perfectly good brand new micro foam mattress out from cat pee! I was so mad. Kitty wanted to go outside and we wouldn't let him so he got even. Good thing I love cats. We got a new mattress , much cheaper, and let kitty out now. (sigh)
Some caregivers are sensitive, or more comfortable with a certain brand of humor. I appreciate that people use any kind of humor to get through this awful job. I love cap's unique irreverance, and I have never seen him target a particular person. He has my support.
Here is my positive input to one of his comments because the discussion thought was expressed. wouldn't that be awesome if all this pain could be spun into gold! I am copying that post
...I had two idea's of hope in all this despair, trying to think something good needs to come of this wailing wall forum....
1) Neighborhood senior care n respite co-op or pools..Where we all rotate or contribute somehow to give each other time off...in each others homes and give our seniors visits with each other they may socialize as well, if they can, but just provide that outlet for us!! In my small community it may be harder but doable and bigger area's be even better??? And the little specifics of the various care n safety issues don't know how that would work???
2) To start/find a thread and or form some kind of group to spread the word, lobby or whatever it is we need to do get this recognized as the epidemic it has and will become....I have been very loosely following AA (alz asscn) posts n news n some other CG sites seeing info on movements like this. Congress n stuff..
I am not well versed in political stuff but would be interesting way to get mind going and feel more empowerment than helplessness....knowledge is power! I If I had my ducks in a row I would start today, but I can barely tie my shoes above keeping ma healthy at this point in the game!!! I feel after what I am living thru I would totally take charge of it if I ever get enuf stability to feel I wont end up living in my car... Maybe we could brainstorm this together/start something!!!
The girls around town have been having pleasure parties wink wink, and how that works like a Tupperware party they want guests to book parties. I thought why don't I throw one and combine long term care insurance expo with it too...the only way I would! LTCI is important stuff!!!
I am off to bed, you guys are awesome!!!
I have to say it was the grossed thread that led me to sign on here. I had reached a point after nearly five years of doing this when I desperately needed to reach out and connect with other people who could truly relate to what I was going through. The title caught my attention, I started to read, and next thing I knew I was enjoying the best laugh I'd had in a really long time. I knew eight then and there I'd found the right site! I also have to say that I went back to it a while later, found my way to the end, read the last few pages...and drew back. NOT because it seemed clique-y...more because I was still "feeling my way around" so to speak and unsure of how to introduce myself. The folks posting on it clearly had already built relationships with one another (which I envied!) and I chose at that time...I CHOSE not to intrude on them...at least not yet.
Cap'n's post was harsh, but I get where he's coming from. I'm in agreement with Mishka and Christina on that one. He is an a22, but a good egg all the same...in spite of himself. And kudos to you Bobbie for handling it with such grace.
And cap'n - don't freak. Pour yourself a glass of everclear and raise a toast. God, fate, whatever you choose to believe in has dealt you a good hand, for now at least. Enjoy!